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Why can different views on money lead to divorce?

On Behalf of | Sep 13, 2023 | Divorce

Finances are traditionally one of the most common reasons that individuals choose to divorce. Issues involving money can be very problematic in a relationship, and many couples will cite them when choosing to move forward alone. It could be the financial pressure of someone losing a job, an instance of financial infidelity or something else entirely.

But it’s important to remember that money-centric problems may also be philosophical in nature. It’s not just that a couple can’t pay their bills or can’t make ends meet because they don’t have enough money to go around. Certainly, that type of financial stress can also lead to divorce, but that’s not the only way that financial challenges contribute to marital splits. Simply viewing money differently can be enough.

A conflict of interests

For example, say that one spouse is a saver, valuing the stability that financial success brings. They want to do things like put money into a retirement account, have a savings account for unexpected expenses and put aside any extra income in case they need it later. This makes them feel prepared and safe. The other spouse is a spender, valuing the experiences that money can provide and the way it can change their life. They want to buy clothes or gadgets, take vacations, go out to eat with friends and generally just enjoy their wealth. This makes them feel invigorated and happy.

Both people have valid reasons to hold these views. It’s not that being a spender or a saver is inherently wrong or causes problems. The issue is simply that a spouse who is a spender will constantly feel like the saver is trying to undermine their lifestyle, while the saver will constantly feel like the spender is wasting the money they worked so hard for. These philosophical differences can cause the entire relationship to break down, especially if the spouses can’t find ways to compromise effectively.

What comes next?

Brambleton couples who find themselves in this position may be in for a contentious divorce. They need to know exactly what legal steps to take when dividing assets and working through the legal process more broadly. Seeking legal guidance is generally a good way to start.